【題目】請(qǐng)你以“My Father”為題，用英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)一篇100詞左右的短文，要點(diǎn)如下：

我的父親是位醫(yī)生，工作勤懇，經(jīng)常早出晚歸，他不僅對(duì)自己而且對(duì)工作嚴(yán)格要求，他總是為病人著想，為病人減輕痛苦。他決心把自己的一生都獻(xiàn)給醫(yī)學(xué)事業(yè)。喜歡讀書(shū)，愛(ài)好音樂(lè)。

適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，使行文連貫。詞數(shù)100左右。

(參考詞匯：解除痛苦：relief/reduce pain 取得巨大成就：achieve great success醫(yī)學(xué)事業(yè)：medical career

My father

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【答案】My father

My father is forty-three years old. He is a tall man with a pair of glasses. He is a doctor who works very hard. He goes out early and comes back at dusk/late. He is not only strict with himself, but also responsible for his work. He spares no efforts to reduce pain for his patients. He has achieved great success in his work. He is determined to devote himself to the medical career. In his free time, he likes reading books and often takes notes on important points. Finally, he came out a book last year. Besides, he likes playing basketball, swimming as well as listening to music to relax.

【解析】這是一篇提綱類作文。同學(xué)們?cè)趯?xiě)這篇文章時(shí)，

要注意以下幾點(diǎn)：1.由于主題是“My Father”為題，寫(xiě)人的作文一般都以一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。

2. 文章的要點(diǎn)也基本上都給出來(lái)了：我的父親是位醫(yī)生，工作勤懇，經(jīng)常早出晚歸，他不僅對(duì)自己而且對(duì)工作嚴(yán)格要求，他總是為病人著想，為病人減輕痛苦。他決心把自己的一生都獻(xiàn)給醫(yī)學(xué)事業(yè)。喜歡讀書(shū)，愛(ài)好音樂(lè)�？忌岩c(diǎn)全交代，不能有遺漏。

3.要拓展內(nèi)容，在寫(xiě)作的過(guò)程中，要注意使用高級(jí)詞匯和高級(jí)句型，如強(qiáng)調(diào)句，倒裝句等，讓文章更上檔次。

4.同時(shí)在列舉措施的時(shí)候要使用合適的連接詞如：First，second， Besides, What’s more等，讓文章看起來(lái)很有條理，也很流暢。本篇文章在寫(xiě)作時(shí)不要啰嗦，力求簡(jiǎn)潔。

【范文亮點(diǎn)】

1.高級(jí)短語(yǔ)的使用：spares no efforts ；achieve great success； is determined to 和連接詞的使用：Finally； Besides,

2.He is not only strict with himself, but also responsible for his work.中的 not only...but also的使用

3.he likes playing basketball, swimming as well as listening to music to relax.

動(dòng)詞的并列的使用

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